So I just crumpled up $5 and threw it in the trash. OK it wasn’t literally $5 in cash but that was the value of the three scratch-off lottery tickets that yielded nothing but silver shavings and a frown from me. Before you say hey that’s what you get for wasting your money – I didn’t buy them. They were a gift.
I’m guessing it is a pretty common thing for bosses, friends and relatives to purchase these square cardboard opportunities for instant riches in lieu of giving cash or something with some heart-felt thought behind it. I guess I am coming across quite Grinchy here so I will expound.
In the history of receiving these scratch-off tickets which I think now totals about 100-120 in my lifetime – I think I have won $6 and about 7-8 ‘free’ tickets which in turn yielded more trash can fodder. To further speak to my luckiness when it comes to cosmic raffles, lotteries, work Christmas party drawings et al – I think in my lifetime I have won a basket of ladies soaps (work Christmas party – unable to use or re-gift), a $5 gas card gift card (what good is that?), $10 Starbucks gift card (I do not like coffee and re-gifted the gift card and was told by the person who got the card that whomever purchased it didn’t get it activated correctly so I looked like a jerk) and I also won a lunchbag collapsable cooler with a retail value of somewhere around $2.
The only slight exception is that I regularly play the Powerball lotto and occassionally the Mega Millions lotto. The greatest success I had was playing in a group of about 15 people from work and we collectively won $250 – which yielded almost $17 per person upon disbursement! I typically play on my own twice a week (Wednesday and Saturday drawings) for two plays now at $2 each, but it was four plays back when the cost per ticket was $1. So if you figure I have been conservatively playing every drawing to the tune of $4 each time based on bi-weekly drawings and fifty-two weeks per year for twenty years – that’s about $8400 rounding up as I know that when the ‘pot’ is larger I tend to throw in a few extra bucks here and there for quick picks.
So based on the information I have outlined above you are probably silently judging me. Call me a fool but I’m an eternal optimist. A broken clock is right twice a day…assuming it’s a clock with a face unless the hands are broken off.
You can’t win if you don’t play. So keep HOPE alive (no that is not a Days of Our Lives reference) and Happy Holidays – Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Merry Kwanza, Feliz Navidad, Happy New Years or whatever solstice originated festival you celebrate even if that encompasses Star Wars based reality.
This will probably be my last blog post…before Christmas. So if I do not somehow encounter you before Santa or Papa Noel or your preference of mythical being of good tidings arrives – peace and happiness to you and yours.
P.S. Hug a cat…or you are wrong.
P.S.S. Do not waste your $25 on the Krampus…wait for Rebox or on-demand for $2-$3.