Cutting the…

You really thought I was going to say cheese didn’t you? C’mon be honest. To be above board here, I thought about it.

But honest and for true, I was coming here with my bag of words to talk about cutting the grasssssssss. Yesterday was the last day of May 2018. Between the front and backyards, I spent about an hour pushing an un-propelled mower around in the heat and humidity. For the most part I was in direct sunlight for a good portion of the struggle but did not burst into flames; although all applicable clothing items were drenched in my sweat by the completion of the task. Let me tell you, that was icky.

So why am I bringing up the topic of cutting the grass? I do it because I’m miffed by it every stinking time! I know it is necessary but there is a reason why I wait and wait: laziness. Then the neighbor goes and tries to show me up by cutting his grass to make me look back. How is that you ask? Well, we share a mutual side area between the houses like most people. The fence in between the houses has a post in the middle that acts as the unofficial divider and when the neighbor cuts his grass, he stops at that post with his mowing. This leaves a visible ‘uncut’ patch of grass on our side. His grass is then nicely cut and even. With this done, the grass right next to it looks awful, mangy and pathetic and screams “a Hoosier lives here!” So regardless of the outside temperatures or inclement weather, the onus is now on me to make my grass presentable. Thanks Jerk.

A slight sliver of silver lining here would be that I get some cardio exercise and burn whatever calories this process burns. But, for the entire duration I am pushing that very basic mower around the expanse of the front and then backyards, I am mentally cursing my neighbor for bringing this reality upon me. If he would not cave to peer pressure and just let his yard go to crap, I would also follow suit…at least for a while.

This weekend with no softball on my agenda, I may be out in the yard again adding insult to my injured laziness. There are bushes to be trimmed, leaves and sticks to be removed from the backyard and some other aesthetically pleasing to-do’s as well. If I was a newly minted Powerball winner, I would pay someone to do these things…at the new place! Because of course,  the first rule to follow after you win the lotto is to move to a place where no one knows you…for security purposes I think.

Alright I think I am done whining…for now. Everyone have a great weekend and a grateful thanks to each person who surfed into my blog site last month to get me to 300 views once again. I vow to try to post more often this month. We shall see if this can be sustained but I will try! Wish me luck!


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