On the brink of madness

Good day and welcome to a post from my WordPress blog. For my dedicated readers I apologize for the dip, as in reduction, of the quantity of posts that appear here. Over the last two and a half months I have posted twenty blog items. During that time I have recorded 9 podcast shows with my friend Jeremy as the duo known as Sports Stalkers. In addition to those 9 shows, I have recorded 9 solo podcasts just as myself sitting in the car recapping my week of activities and a few opinion pieces – both using the Podbean app. On top of those, I have been double posting on Twitter for the Sports Stalkers podcast promotion and also my own personal account. Of course there is my Facebook account (personal) and the Facebook account for the Sports Stalkers show that I post on hither and dither.

With these forms of social media plus a full-time job and a personal life, my days and nights are quite full. Unfortunately, my blog I think has suffered. I did not mean to slight my readers who faithfully surfed in looking for new material and perspective but if I have slighted you, I apologize. Writing is my creative passion. Up through the end of November I was averaging 500 plus hits per month on ye ole blog of mine (sung to the tune of Sweet Child of Mine by of course, Guns ‘N’ Roses). The best case scenario would be for me to win the Powerball lottery and thus free up my time from ‘working’ to work on my passions that have bloomed in blogging and podcasting. But alas my cosmic gambling skills must not be too good because routinely I play but only match a stray number or two here and there. So until that avenue leads to fruition, I will continue to divert the flow of my thoughts into words – both verbal and virtual. Be patient and just like Shane Falco sitting on the turf after his teammate Danny crushes him in practice, we all need a minute to ‘work sh!t out’ (The Replacements).

Have a great Valentine’s Day and try not to OD on chocolate. So far today I’ve consumed four Hersey’s Kisses, a square of Ghiradelli caramel center chocolate and two chocolate covered devil’s food cake donuts. It’s too late for me but save yourselves!

For those of you wondering what is going on in the background while I write this, I have The Crow streaming on my phone from Netflix. The hock shop store keeper just tried to end Eric Draven with a hand gun shot to the chest…that didn’t go over too well the the deceased but returned specter. If you have never seen the movie, I highly recommend it. Not the sequels mind you but just the original with Brandon Lee…may he rest in peace. “Is that gasoline I smell?” (((((BOOM)))))

For Kristi – Happy Valentine’s Day my love. We’ll have a cheesy good time!

Peace and love.

Valentine’s Day Eve

In the background there is some slow indistinct classical music playing. Then in a whiplash…it turns into the theme from the major motion picture (back in the day) Jaws! Get out of the water! Get out of the water!

Oh wait, my bad. Tomorrow is the flowers and candy holiday. The water is fine, wade back in and relax.

((((((CHOMP)))))))

Got heem!

Although no one really gets off work for this ‘holiday’ (not even the post office), everyone knows what it is about: pink things, love, heart-shaped candies and soon to die flowers. You can hide egss but most everyone who participates is expecting Valentine’s cards from coast to coast and for the most part around the globe. I am sure that there are some remote portions of the planet where Valentine’s Day is an unknown concept. Most likely those places are where famine, war and poverty are prevalent, but otherwise the red and pink observance is noticeable widespread.

Here, next to the mighty Mississippi river, florists are working feverishly (some possibly have contracted the flu virus) to fulfill orders of flowers accompanied by candies and unrealistic looking faux bears. Seriously, how many live bears in nature have you beheld wearing a tutu made of tulle? Don’t get me wrong, the fabric was very useful to Tom Hanks’ character in the movie Castaway but on a half-ton sized mammal that loves to fish? C’mon.

Anywho…I hope you are either the grateful recipient of the ‘holiday’ adoration or the beneficiary of affection lavished in response to acceptable Valentine’s Day gifts. A Google search will yield you many options as to what is acceptable by the opposing sex or same-sex partner relationship dynamic you may occupy. For those of you celebrating the holiday (or not celebrating it), may you have a satisfying set of meals and perhaps receive no junk mail.

Good luck and may the force (of love) be with you.

Peace.

Closing Time

Some of you may be having a song by the group Semisonic running through your brain right now and for that I applaud you. But a step back from there if you will. For anyone who has gone out to a local watering hole aka a bar, you know that they serve alcoholic drinks, non-alcoholic drinks and food. Some have a jukebox or live entertain or TV’s or a combo of these. These are great places to hang out, enjoy a meal and people watch. But as the minutes and hours tick by, the end looms nigh.

Here is what I am angling towards in the title of the piece. Closing time. You don’t have to go home…but you can’t stay here as the song plainly tells us. For a rigidly set number of hours per day, these businesses welcome you and your cash or debit cards to ‘spend’ some time there. But once that time limit is reached, then things get dicey. All the servers and bartenders who were saying “Hey Darlin what can I get ya?”, all of a sudden turn into minions of the underworld. Unseen demons turn on all of the lights the establishment has plus they roll in a few military caliber spotlights, blinding and disorienting all of the humans still occupying their business. Megaphones are produced from thin air and the “pay your tabs and get out” shouts boom through your skull. Every 30 or 45 seconds this message repeats with more and more hostility. After about three and a half minutes you feel deep inside your soul that the movie from Dusk Until Dawn is about to bloom into reality.

I understand that the majority of the bar crowd by closing time is either buzzed or down-right drunk and slow to embrace leaving the source of their good time for the evening. But, my word, as mean and nasty as the employees of the bar get with their patrons, it’s a wonder that anyone ever comes back. Maybe I am taken aback more than most people because usually by closing time I have stopped drinking for an extended period of time (sobered up) and therefore recollect more the next day than say someone who is inebriated (hammered). In my imagination, I am trying to imagine a local mom and pop supermarket or Walgreens or fitness center where the closing hour is reached and like the flip of a switch the managers and employees just start berating their customers to “pay up and get out” in a loud screaming voice. It boggles the mind and seems like a very short-term business plan.

As a relative newbie to the bar scene (over the last 4-5 years) I guess I am just late to the party. If I know a place closes at a specific time, I usually try not to be there within 15 minutes of the deadline. If a restaurant closes at 10pm…I’m not ordering food (to be spit in) at 9:40pm unless it’s the fast food drive-thru (where spit is expected). Hair-cutting place…at 10 minues to close…probably not a great idea…tired and anxious worker with sharp scissors…nevermind.

I try to be conscious of other people in their natural work environments and unless it’s absolutely necessary, I try to patronize them during the nice middle of their operating hours. In my opinion, I think secretly inside everyone desires to act like the bar staff at six minutes past closing. Slinging profanities and ordering people out the door like they rule that kingdom (off with their heads!!). This is probably where I get called a sissy or vag or something else emasculating but I don’t care. It just seems weird to me to go back to anyplace where I stayed too long and got verbally beat down for doing nothing more than standing within the confines of the business a few hundred seconds after ‘the end’.

Oh well, the world continues to spin and those same bars will be filled with many of the usual suspects following their normal patterns. Perhaps next time I will try something amusing. How about a small experiment where I pretend that I am hearing impaired and see how it plays out. It could result in me needing bail money, but who knows?

Until next time…Peace. (NOW GET OUT!!) 🙂

Super Bowl Sunday

Hello! Hope you enjoy the game. I will be watching and have picked the Patriots to win. Who do you have coming out on top?

Peace.

Siri what do ya got?

Question to Siri:
Does Nora Jones have a favorite restaurant for each day of the week?

Question to Siri:
Which Spice Girl would most likely make the most successful transition to be a man?

Question to Siri:
Do you think my fingerprints could be preserved forever?

Question to Siri:
Who’s your daddy?

Question to Siri:
Do you think Sonny from iRobot was the sexiest robot in that movie?

Question to Siri:
What question could cause an infinity loop in your logic and destroy you?

Question to Siri:
What is your least favorite acid compound?

Question to Siri:
Do you think chickens curse at each other in their own special language?

Question to Siri:
Do you think the former Major League baseball player, Steve Howe, should have been given as many chances as he was allowed to come back to the game after his many suspensions for drug and alcohol abuse?

Question to Siri:
Why?