I Need A Little Patience

So many things whirl around in my head. All the time. It’s like a non-stop vortex that’s not really there but yet always there. Round and round she goes, where she stops no one knows…

As usual I’m sure you are not completely following my gist and that is quite OK. Some days it is like two children with interlocked hands going rapidly in a circle. At first there are some giggles as the sensation is exhilarating and then as the speed increases and the awareness of potential harm rises…the laughter stops and they look for a safe way out.

…this is an excerpt from a story I have had in my head for a few months now. There are many things trapped inside my brain and the rate of release is far too slow for allow for a safe and slow stoppage it feels like most days.

From a very young age I turned introspective. This was mostly due to absent parents (who needed to work to support us), a mentally challenged older brother and very limited vocabulary dogs. Aside from school where I didn’t blend well with the majority of my classmates, I spent a great deal of time by myself. I taught myself my mechanically awful and yet at times beautiful softball swing. From the springboard of my Commodore 64, I learned by trial and error rough computer programming and an enjoyment of video games. Through punishments I dove into reading and used that as a vehicle to eclipse the time served as best as possible.

Fast forward to the here and now. At times I still feel like that 10 year old kid, banished to his room for youthful offenses, with so many thoughts and self-doubts ever present. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t change my life the way it is now. What would be the point? The glass half empty mentality reasons: It could always be worse. Everyone has their own journey and baggage and inner sanctum.

With the last few grains of sand left in the August hour glass, about to flip over to September, I need to mentally look around 360 degrees. It has been a pretty good year for the most part. Yes, Kristi did injure herself and I had to say good bye to two amazing musical artists gone too soon but otherwise there have been more good days than bad days. I’ve gotten to make some new softball friends and on the wings of my two podcasts reach so many more people that I most likely never would have. For these things I am grateful, very grateful.

If, and some days that is the largest word in the English language, I can stay out of my own way, the days to come have so much potential. Self-doubt and self-sabotage typically do far more damage than external forces in my opinion and experiences. So if I can stay focused on my goals and the good things in my life, there will be even more good days to outweigh the negatives. A huge key to this plan is patience. Rome was not built in a day but it was finished on a day. I do not know if I will ever accomplish anything noteworthy or memorable but I vow to at least try…until my breath stops forever. To everyone around the globe who reads my blog or once read my blog, thank you. Truly.

Patience and peace.


…or just regular life. So close and yet not close at all. Stupid Powerball deities not bending to my will! I failed at aligning the number tumblers for the galactic fortune of Powerball, yet again. So I once again write to you as a pauper.

Today I have officially filled all the team slots for my podcast inspired Fantasy Football League through Yahoo Sports. This will be my first stab at being commissioner. To make things interesting there will be 15 other competitors with my girlfriend being one and my co-host on the Sports Stalkers podcast being another. It is a free league for fun but I would imagine at some point there will be some disputes and maybe good natured chatter. I am excited and this has been a much better week than the last one.

To everyone out there reading this, thank you for checking out my blog and if you get adventurous you can check out both of my podcasts on the Podbean app (Sports Stalkers and The Freak Show) plus my other social media accounts: Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr!

Have a great weekend!


Halloween Costume Prospectus

Halloween is a mere 69 days away. This year I thought I would get jump on the Halloween-mania and select my costume now! Last year I was Robin of Batman fame. So this time around why not flip the script and go ‘bad guy’? Enter Classic Riddler (?). Question marks all over clothing has long been in fashion so why not?

Green and purple. I’m set. What are you going to be?

Have a full and satisfying Tuesday.



The Total Solar Eclipse vs Y2K Madness

Like the sun is like totally going to be like obscured and such for like two and a half minutes. Oh My Gawd!

So for my peoples in the path of destruction, where will you be on Monday, August 21st at 1:15pm-ish? Will you be hunkered in a bunker? Rooftop to stare at the sun spot?

Me, I will be at work while Kristi’s child will be at home because school has been cancelled to allow for the two plus minute window of darkness in the afternoon (face palm). Here’s a thought: It’s the middle of the friggin afternoon. If it gets too dark while driving you can turn on your headlights! Here’s a second thought: What are you going to do if it is cloudy that afternoon? Maybe try to get a refund for your #$@#@* eclipse glasses?

Why am I so anti-eclipse? Simply because it’s not that big of a deal. I say this as a person who got a C+ in all my science classes because I frankly do not find science all that interesting. Don’t get me wrong, science is great and the basis behind all or most of society’s conveniences. But for me it’s like magic. I know their is some sort of logic on why things occur and how ‘tricks’ unfold but I’ll let them remain a mystery and be accepting of the awe and wonder without getting all geeked up.

Some people may be of an age to remember and appreciate the hysteria from the Y2K malarkey. For those who were of an age to comprehend things back in the year of 1999, there was an unease and shallow panic in the throngs of the populace. The year 2000 was coming. The possible end of the world was coming. Computers as we knew them then were going to turn into smoking balls of fire once December 31st at 11:59pm clunked beyond the next minute. The collective electronic globe held it’s breath and hugged loved ones close as they prepared for the unimaginable. On that last day in December, the seconds raced toward the ‘end’.

11:59:59…turned into 12:00:00 and there were innumerable explosions! Ok Ok it was just locals shooting off fireworks and discharging firearms like any other new year’s celebration. But the hype, fear and pandemonium leading up to that point were unfounded. Yes I’m sure there were some programs that saved the files at the bottom of the list instead of the top where the newest stuff should get saved but for the most part nothing of note happened.

My point here is that for the most part I don’t anticipate anything of significance occurring on Monday either. The oceans will not rise and turn the all continents into a modern Atlantis. Gravity will not be suspended; thus sending everything not rooted to the Earth’s crust hurtling into the farthest reaches of oxygen-less space.

Monday morning will arrive. Monday afternoon will happen. It will become some shade of darkness. (Note: As a general rule you should not stare at the sun but if you have these ‘special’ glasses then go for it.) The eclipse will commence and then wane and everything will more or less be the same as before. A billion pictures will be uploaded onto social media. A trillion social media statuses will be something related to the solar event. This will go on for days until something else moderately interesting comes along and then it will cease to be noteworthy topic until those end of the year recap shows for TV and radio.

If you are hosting an eclipse party and I’ve offended you, I quasi-apologize. By which I mean to say: sorry-not sorry. I implore you to have your fun but for me, I put the eclipse on par with my appreciation for the sport of soccer. If it’s your cup of tea, more power to you but I’m viciously bored with both.

Have a great weekend and make sure to protect yourself on Monday from the marauding hordes of Big Bang Gangs crisscrossing the country!


The Struggle is Real

I was sitting in on a virtual webinar today at work. Naturally I locked onto something completely out of context to the material being presented. A thought occurred to me and laughed out loud at my desk. The presenter was talking about his daughter and how she ‘struggles’ with math.

In today’s society, we tend to substitute words for things to be a little gentler and politically correct. Things in our jobs can be challenging is a nice way of saying something is “A big pain in the arse”. So when you hear someone say that someone struggles at something…it’s a nice way of saying “they suck at it”.

Oh it’s true, it’s darn true!

Right now I am struggling at playing nice with certain people.  🙂

Hope you are NOT struggling at enjoying your Friday. Have a greeeeeaaaaaat Friday and subsequent weekend.



Let’s Play A Game

OK ready, set, go!

Name something that sets you off. When I saw sets you off, I mean something that makes you outwardly or inwardly cringe.

I’m just having one of those weeks where so many stimuli are pounding my brain and I’m doing my best to not say mean, hurtful and honest things. But that’s what resumes are for I guess…

Hope your week and plans are going well. By the by, if you would like to share your gripes you can hit me up on Facebook, Twitter or send me a text.

Have a splendid Thursday.


Swing Away If The Rain Will Go Away!

Tonight I am supposed to play league softball at Fenton Park. As I type this, the windows here are being pelted with strong wind and rain. This may translate into a rain out and no softball for me. If that happens I will be sad because I was really looking forward to getting in BP (batting practice) to divert some of my inner frustrations and depressing thoughts.

What do I have to be frustrated and depressed about? Too much to type here and for the record no one cares anyway so why bother to waste the energy expounding on the topic. Normally I would shunt this kind of post to my Tumblr account but today I’m just in give up and don’t care mode.

I hope your day is going better than the pathetic mental progression I was stepping through last night at the Dollar Tree in Arnold (MO).


For the record I am not perfect, nor have I ever said or implied that I am.

Waiting for the Wings…

First off let me get in a free plug for Holties (Bar and Restaurant) in Barnhart. In my opinion, they have the “BEST TRASHED WINGS” in the area. Their regular hot wings are pretty good as well. One other bit of business before I hop into my blog topic: WHY THE HELL IS HIGHWAY M STILL CLOSED AT 55? If someone could answer that for me, that would be greeeeaaaat.

One night late last week, I sat down at the bar and placed my order with the lady bartender: a cheese burger with fries and two orders of wings to go. I ordered a batch of regular hot wings and a second for trashed wings (MINE!). This young looking Caucasian guy who introduced himself as Joshua (apparently he works at Mobil on the Run in Pevely!), obviously a bit drunk, sits down next to me and shout-talks to me about how he wanted to punch the guy in the mirror in the bathroom. I said, wouldn’t that guy in the mirror be your face? Slurring his words, he said: No actually it was your face! (he smiled warily) Diffusing the moment, I distracted him by asking how he shattered the face of his smartphone. From here he starts telling me about how great Castlewood State Park (near Ballwin, MO) is for hiking because that is where he dropped his phone face down on some rocks. I informed him that I disliked hiking but I did like dogs and often there are people walking their dogs at parks. He proceeded to show me a picture of his friend’s dog who was hiking with them earlier that day (spooky coincidence). Overhead on the bar TV the Cardinals game was over and they were recapping the low lights. Again I must remind you, Joshua was shout-talking as some drunk are want people do. The lady bartender tried to coax him into speaking in a normal inside voice but to no avail. He insisted that I add him on Snapchat but I did not have service in the bar (thanks T-Mobile!). I put on a frown and conveyed that I was unable to make that happen for him. For the ten minutes or so that I sat at the bar waiting for my food, he pretty much sat there shouting my ear off but not in mean way mind you so it wasn’t too bad. Actually I kind of took the situation as a challenge. I tried to think of random topics and mention them to him to see how he would respond.

After awhile one of the servers took pity on me and asked, “Aren’t you waiting on food?” I replied that I was indeed and she retrieved the cooked items from the prep area. Taking my take out, I bid Joshua a good night and told him to get home safe. Some people might have been annoyed by this stranger and just blew him off. But it was only ten minutes out of my life and my jaw was not wired shut so what would it hurt to talk to him? If nothing else, I think I entertained the staff of Holties by keeping this young man out of their collective hair and let them do their jobs without interruption for a bit.

Morale of my story…sometimes go with the flow and see where it takes you.

Have a great Hump Day!



Holties Pub and Restaurant – Facebook


Last night on my podcast for Sports Stalkers on the Podbean app, my co-host Jeremy incorrectly used the term apathetic when speaking about a teammate. What he meant to say was the opposite of apathetic to characterized this guy on his team. Rich Jones is a very nice guy and a heckuva good teammate.

Today I used the word truss with my girlfriend Kristi. She has been experiencing back pain and I meant to convey an apparatus to more or less girdle her and strengthen her back…but I think it came across more like the noun instead of the verb. If she went with the literal sense, I could see her mentally picturing physical outside supports around her, kind of like a vertical mine shaft.

In reviewing last night’s podcast, I was very quick to make fun of Jeremy (on Facebook) for using a word he really did not understand or obviously use all that much in his life. Now, I am here to give myself a pardon for a similar situation. In this instance, my word usage was sort of like the double play in baseball where the second baseman doesn’t actually step on the second base bag before throwing the ball to first for the out but the runner going to second is called out on the ‘in the area play’. For the record, this lazy interpretation will probably never happen again in real baseball with the implementation of instant replay, which I for one applaud. If you don’t touch the base with your foot, then there is no out!

Bottom line, sorry Jeremy you are still on the hook and I get a pass. If you do not like it…start your own blog!

Happy Monday y’all!


<<August 7, 2017>>

Happy Belated Birthday Christina Robinson

Some of you are scrambling to the Google app to figure out who that is. But before you do, just know that yesterday was her 19th birthday. Now to end the suspense…she portrayed Astor Bennett on a Showtime series. Still drawing a blank…then let me cut to the heart of the matter. She was Rita Bennett’s daughter on one of my favorite shows of all-time: Dexter.

So Happy Belated Birthday Young Lady! To the rest of us not in the vicinity of our birthdays…back to work!  🙂


Cue the Jaws movie theme…

Occasionally my mind travels in weird loops instead of the normal linear process that most people enjoy. It’s not all bad. Sometimes I get an idea out of the blue and run with it. This morning it was shark cages.

Now I didn’t say Shark Tank like the popular TV show. I said, shark cages, you know like the metal ones they drop into the ocean with humans inside who want to ‘swim with the sharks’? Crazy mofo’s is all I’m saying there. But nonetheless, the idea of shark cages kept darting at my brain like a moth to the softball field lights at Wolffs Softball Haven during the late games of league.

Shark cages. How much does a ‘nice’ shark cage cost? How much does a cheap shark cage cost for that matter? Who makes a quality product and who has negative reviews (if they survived to post about it)? Can I get one on Amazon.com and get free two day shipping with my Prime membership? Does it come pre-assembled or is there like an 80-page booklet of instructions to go with 361 unique parts to put together? Do they offer an extended warranty?

With the miracle of Google, I was able to cultivate some rough information but most of it is skewed towards people just wanting the dive experience with a company that has existing cages. For example, this one company near San Francisco offers a special $825 price per diver in the cage (max 4 people in cage) but they also do not guarantee that you will see a shark. No refunds for shark no-shows or equipment malfunctions (air tank failure? boat sinks?) to boot. Although, for that $825 price it included a boat charter, time in the water (in the cage) and wet suit with air tank rental. So all-in-all that seemed like a decent time unless Megalodon comes along and swallows your cage with you safely still inside! In hopping from site to site, I did see one place overseas that offered “kids swim for free” (in the cage). Sounds like a great traumatic experience for impressionable young minds!

But eventually I did find some rough pricing for buying a cage. Depending on what size and what bells and whistles you wanted, you could get a ‘personal’ cage for about $8000 and other more industrial cages went for about $25,000. The caveat being that you needed to have a vessel capable of first hauling, then dropping and withdrawing the cage from the ocean.

Hopefully you found this post both informative and enlightening. If you were on the fence about purchasing a shark cage or swimming with the sharks and this piece didn’t sway you one way or the other, perhaps watch the movie 47 Meters Down.

Glub Glub Glub GLUB!

That was me underwater saying to have a great day.